Seen today

A headline in the local newspaper:

"Youth Commission Members Are Busy, And Their Plan Is To Get Even Busier."

Oooooooo yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


A message T on one of my students, a friendly kid who is deaf and autistic:

"I'm probably not listening to you."

:)

Ever want to just quit your job?

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On a lighter note:

Me (finishing up an explanation, because the student, a little boy, wanted to know): So "boyfriend/girlfriend" is like going to movies and having dinner and stuff... well, I guess you could do that with your friends, too. But it means someone LIKES you likes you, not just likes you as a friend.

Male Student, Aged Six: Ew.

Me: Well, your mom and dad were boyfriend-girlfriend before they got married!

Student: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Don't tell me that! (pauses) Okay, tell me that.

Me: You didn't know that?

Student: Well, I kinda did, since yesterday. They didn't tell me, but I read their minds. And then I threw up a little bit. I really did.

Twos

Why is it that bananas and strawberries, on their own, are acceptable, yet if you slice and mix the two together, anarchy ensues?

Doodlepoops

So can you tell that I don't like the Doodlebops? This past weekend, while watching a TiVo'd copy with Colin, I found another reason for my dislike: lack of grammar.

(Scene: Backstage, the Doodlebops and Jazzmin discussed how great it was that Rooney Doodle (a.k.a. "the blue one", "the gay one", "not the breakdancing one, the other one") gave his old ukelele to a fan. Let the agrammaticality begin!)

Deedee: You can always borrow one.
Rooney: From who?
Jazzmin: Myself!

This is supposed to be EDUCATIONAL? That was two errors in two seconds! UGH!

Nah funnee!

On two totally different topics...

Colin decided, two days ago, that he wanted to sit on his toilet for 15 minutes before getting in the tub. Then, yesterday, he decided to sit on the toilet in the afternoon. Of course, he had to strip down to his socks. Then... he actually pooed in the toilet. He was like, "Uh!" and pointed to it like, "Oh, damn, I totally ruined a perfectly good toilet!" I clapped and said, "That's where the poo goes! Give me five!" and he's like, "Noooooo." Eventually, he'll get it.

Hey, anyone scared of BLOOD?!?!? This kid is adorable.

Some things never change

This really takes me back - hearing a classic. In the classroom next door, I hear the teacher working with the students.

Teacher: When Father came home, what was he going to do?

Students: Kill the pig!

Teacher: Yes, that's right. And what did Fern say?

Students: No, stop!

I'll always remember E.B. White's wonderful "Charlotte's Web" and the beautiful Garth Williams drawings that complemented it. And I love hearing how the story still captivates children today.

Nutty Health

Overheard at The Prolific Oven this morning.

(Enter grandparents in their early 60s and their granddaughter, a young teenager.)

Woman, perusing baked goods: Don't they have anything healthy here?

Man: Let's see...

Woman: I don't see anything healthy.

Employee: Can I help you?

Woman: Yes. Two Diet Cokes...