Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Parenting a four-month-old

So it's been WAY TOO LONG since my last post. I've been busy learning how to be a parent... AND starting up work again.

As the three-month mark approached, and brought my start back to work with it, I began to worry. My mom would tell me, "What if [day care] lets him cry? What if they say, 'You're cute, but there's another baby over here crying, so you'll have to wait'?" My mother-in-law told me, "You should just stay home."

But I was committed to going back three days per week (down from five days).

But the time three months came along, I *really* wanted to work. I needed a break from the "Mommy Show". Women feel guilty admitting that, and other women may deride them for that, but it's true: staying home is the hardest job there is. Some people are cut out for it. I needed stimulation outside of the home and, realistically, a break from my son, no matter how cute and wonderful he was and how much gravity of responsibility for him I felt.

So I went back to work; my mother-in-law started coming on Mondays to watch the baby; my husband dropped him off at daycare on Tuesdays and Thursdays; and I picked him up in the afternoons.

And though there is no such thing as "free time" any more, I feel that I'm a much more effective parent. I really enjoy my time away, and I really enjoy my time with him. I feel like I've got the best of both worlds. And yes, day care could actually end up being beneficial for the baby as well. I'm sure some would agree, and others would disagree. But it's a personal decision.

I still feel like I'm learning all of the time. For example, a couple of weeks ago, the baby started to be fussy and not sleep well. I noticed he had what looked like the start of ingrown nails on two fingers. He also had gas. And he had already developed eczema and his first cold. But the fussiness lingered. Sleep became a blessed event when it occured. I even took the baby to the doctor to find out what was wrong. Then, last Wednesday, I was home playing with him when I noticed that two of his fingers had green spots on them!! The same two that were red before. I just knew that meant infection. I took him to the doctor two hours later, they drained one area (no crying!), and put him on Keflex. Looking on the Internet the other night, it appears that he has the most common hand infection in the United States. It can be caused by staph or strep, and starts with a break in the skin (like from an ingrown nail!) and then nail biting or hand-sucking (like my little pre-teether was doing). BINGO!!!! Not to mention that once he had been on antibiotics for about 24 hours AND taking Tylenol, he started sleeping again.

I feel totally lame.

Well, hopefully the second one will not end up as psychologically scarred as the first, the one who dealt with the first-time parents!!!!

All in all, my life is even more wonderful than it ever has been... every day is an adventure, and truly interesting. And seeing that beautiful little face smiling at me, and patting his head as he nestles up against my chest... well, it's just the best.

Here's my little mijo at three months. Love that face!