The laughs keep rolling in...

Neighbor comes to front door.

Neighbor: The dome light's on in your car again.

Me (sarcastically, to Colin): You wouldn't know any little boys who do that, now, do you?

Colin (not understanding sarcasm): Yes I do. I do it all the time.

------

Neighbor (above neighbor's wife) is talking to Colin.

Neighbor: Do you play nice with Sissy?

Colin: No.

Neighbor: You don't play nice with Sissy?

Colin: No, not "Sissy", it "Baby Hayden". You not speak Engwish.

-----

Neighbor is still talking to Colin.

Neighbor: Where are you going?

Colin: To Michael's, and to coffee.

Neighbor: Coffee? You're not going to drink coffee, are you? You're too young!

Colin: No, I get banina milk.

Neighbor: Oh, vanilla milk! Who drinks coffee?

Colin: Mommy, Daddy, Grandpa. But Grandpa, he not like coffee all the time. He like wine.

-----

We're listening to music, and Colin hears the opening strains of Muse's "Starlight".

Colin: Mommy, 'member this song? He say, "Far away... far away...."

Mommy: You like this song?

Colin: I do. It have a beat. You can dance to it.

-----

Colin (singing in shower): "Mais si je t'aime, si je t'aime..."

Me (to hubby): Is he singing "Habanera" from "Carmen"?

Colin blinding me with language

Um... what?

Colin: Mommy, Baby Hayden so smart. And she so pretty. She almost too young, but she smile at me.

-----

Oh well, I didn't want to discuss mochacide with a three-year-old anyway...

Colin (looking at the ceiling): Mommy, someone throw coffee beans up there!

Me (seeing brown splatters on the high ceiling): Either that or somebody's mocha exploded.

Colin: No, they want to recycle their beans.

Note: we always discuss about how - amazingly - Peet's Coffee doesn't have recycling receptacles. Perhaps he imagined an adult having some kind of fit...

A general update...

Colin has taught me a lot in the past few days.

"We don't eat dachshunds, Mommy."

"Dachshunds don't wear swimsuits, Mommy."

"There are too many kids, so there's no swings available."

"She's a baby, so she not learn."

Hayden, of course, is progressing along at her own speed - which is approximately 1.5 times the speed of her brother at the same age. She got her first tooth on 8/30, the second one popped out earlier this week, and the following day, she pulled herself to standing in her crib, inched her way over, and grabbed her mobile. Though she's not crawling yet, we're expecting her to graduate from the commando crawl any day now.

Meanwhile, I'm still about 1700 e-mails behind in my professional groups, I started back to work one day per week, and the kitchen has never looked cleaner. Bravo.

That's why they're stagnating in the job market

Colin: Squirrels can't learn Spanish, Mommy.

Me: They can't?

Colin: No, because they not watch TV.

Astute observations from a three year old

Colin: Puppies don't read books, Mommy.

Me: They don't?

Colin: No. Because I know, because they not learn.
---

Me: Look, Colin, a bug! What is it - a moth? A little cricket?

Colin: (getting down to the bug's level) Are you a cricket? (silence) No, Mommy, he not a cricket.

---

Hubby: (to me) Do you sign "milk" to Hayden?

Colin: No, Daddy, Hayden not drink milk. She drink formyuhyuh.

Colin's latest word

"Japamatoes"

Which is, of course, "Japanese Maples".

Duh.